Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Betty ford says i'm here all night
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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