hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
