Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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