I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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