Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
