her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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