So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Girls should come with a carfax report
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
