I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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