She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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