never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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