Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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