I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
