Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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