Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize