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• (208): View more from Idaho

  She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk

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• (805): View more from California

  I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  Speaking is such a hard concept right now

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.

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