Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
39 Memes Anyone Who Cries When They See Their Bank Account Will Relate To
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.