Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
