"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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