On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
