i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I think people are normalizing furries
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
