Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
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