Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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