I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
