you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
God, I missed his penis.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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