I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
