Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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