Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
