Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize