i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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