ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize