I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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