we're blogging at a bar
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize