i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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