omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.