He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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