How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You were trust falling into bushes
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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