I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
