She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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