I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
