The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize