Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Please, let me fuck your mom
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
