she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
