i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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