i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
