escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
The struggles of a small town man whore
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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