Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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