Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize