So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT