haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize