Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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