WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize