forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
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Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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